The Value of Loyalty
I had 3 dogs. After a breakup I now have 1 dog. When I had all 3 I was fascinated by their behavior and the way they presented a unified front against any perceived threat.
Dogs have a pack mentality. That means that they are happiest when with their pack, or as humans call it, family. They are not happy when they are alone or away from their pack. Dogs all know their place within their pack. They may test their status every now and again but they know where they belong.
Dogs love to play and fight with each other. When one of my dogs had a toy he was playing with, the other dogs immediately wanted that toy. Even if there were several other toys available they had to have the one that their brother had. This fascinated me that they could be so selfish one moment and want to take away the toy the other dog had.
But what really fascinates me is that in an instant the dogs behavior can change and they present a unified front. Say they heard a sound in the backyard, they would all run to the backdoor and bark together. It didn’t matter what they were doing, or if they were fighting with one another, if one dog barked or sensed a threat they would all 3 jump in and immediately help their pack member.
Don’t ever take side with anyone against the family…ever. -The Godfather
This is why I love dogs. They are 100% loyal to their pack without question. Doesn’t matter if they are barking at a squirrel, a bigger dog, a bear, or a neighbor, they are all their together to protect each other. A dog will die for his pack. Because of my dog’s unquestioning loyalty he isn’t just ‘my dog’, he is part of my family. Because he is part of my pack his loyalty is returned with my unquestioning loyalty and companionship.
Primitive tribes had the same structure as a dog pack. Each tribe had it’s de-facto leader(s), the Alpha Male and Alpha female, the followers, the beta males and females, and the weak, crippled, sick, and young, the Omegas. They would have had to present a unified front in the presence of danger – other tribes, large carnivorous animals etc.. If they did not remain loyal to their tribe they risked being ostricized and banned from the tribe.
Humans, like Dogs, need companionship, security, comfort, and a sense of belonging to be healthy and happy. Think of the dogs that have been chained in a backyard for their entire life without much human contact or care and without another animal to interact with. These are not the dogs you want to stumble upon unknowingly. Those of us without a tribe, pack, family, to give us a sense of belonging and purpose are like these chained dogs. We may be content but we can’t be truly happy without a purpose.
Young men who do not have a strong family life, or sense of purpose, will get together with other guys from the same background and form gangs. In interviews these guys will repeatedly say that they joined because they had a sense of family and loyalty for the first time in their life. These guys would unquestioningly inflict violence against anyone who harmed (real or perceived) a part of their tribe, or gang. These guys referred to their gang buddies, which they really felt like were their family, as their “dogs”. These guys are the true backyard dogs who have been chained up for their whole life – and this is what can happen without a strong sense of loyalty and belonging.
In our modern world of celebrity gossip and other bs, loyalty is not a common trait. Just take a look at the latest divorce figures. 50% percent of first marriages, 67% of second and 74% of third marriages end in divorce.
What it would take for me to get married is 100% unquestionable loyalty from my spouse. If you don’t have your spouse or significant others back 100% of the time and don’t present a unified front it can never work. You can’t have a fulfilling relationship without loyalty.
This is not easy to find. In fact, you have to treat your s/o like you would your dog. If she is good you reward her (attention), if she is bad you punish her (withdraw attention) until she learns what you demand – loyalty.
To be a real man you must be loyal to those you love and you have to demand loyalty right back.
You must be willing to die for what you believe in.
Live Like a Spartan : Get Rid of Your Wallet
Wallets are stupid.
There is no point in a man carrying around 80 different bits of paper and other junk. Wallets are also bad for the posture. It’s like sitting on one brick ech time you sit down. Throw away the wallets and simplify your life! When I used to carry a wallet I would usually just leave it in my truck and take out the few things I needed. Yet, I still held on to the scraps of paper, old insurance cards, old credit cards, and other nonsense.
Get rid of it!
Now: I carry around a money clip with only the things I need. These things I need consist of:
1) Drivers License. Obviously this is something everyone needs to carry around. Except for criminals. I have learned that criminals avoid the DMV like the bubonic plague.
2) Personal debit card. If I want to buy something I hand the clerk my debit card. No need for wadded up dollar bills.
3) Business debit card. Same reason as above.
4) Personal credit card. Same reason as above.
5) State issued ID. This is probably redundant for me to carry considering I carry a Drivers License. This is a leftover from my dirt poor days when I drove less than legally (illegally) and needed an ID to get into bars. Priorities for the young and dumb.
6) Starbucks gift card. Occasionally I meet with clients at a Starbucks and I like to use this gift card which I received for free instead of using my own money. When there is no money left I will toss the card in the garbage instead of putting it back in wallet (money clip, actually) purgatory.
7) One business card. This actually serves as somewhat of a bookend for my stuff. It helps me fill out the clip. I carry more business cards with my padfolio so there is no need for more in my money clip.
That’s it. What else could a man need to carry around every day?
Simplify your life gentlemen. It makes things so much easier. Let the women carry around all the extra junk in their purses. That’s what they are for. Purses. Not women. That’s why we don’t carry around man-purses everywhere. We don’t need all that extra clutter.
Why You Should Quit Your Job
If you have a dream that you want to pursue then the first thing you should do is quit your J.O.B. (just over broke). The worst thing you can do is take a “temporary” job to help pay the bills. Five years later you’re stuck at that same job wondering where the time went and what happened to your ambitions. If you don’t have any dreams or ambitions and just want to survive, then by all means take a job. But if you aren’t like the rest of them, you really have dreams of doing something great then never take a job doing something you hate.
The best thing I ever did in my life was quit my job. The job that I hated. The job that I dreaded going to every morning. People thought I was nuts but it didn’t matter. I had a plan and nothing was going to stop me. I quit with barely enough money to survive for a month. That forced me to hustle like never before. It was a very scary time but it has paid off in dividends.
People say “never quit your job until you’re making enough to support yourself”. Yeah, right. That will take you years to start pulling in enough income from your side gig while spending 50 plus hours a week making other people rich. Quitting your job will show you what you are really made of. It is like being stranded in the Yukon with nothing but a rifle. You have to go out and find your own food or you will starve to death.
Obviously, you must have a plan if you quit your job. You can’t quit with no money and no idea of how to start making money. But if you have an idea, and a fire burning inside, then give up the crummy job. You will be glad you did. Either you will succeed and start doing what you’ve always wanted or you will fail. Failure is not a bad thing. Failure is a fantastic teacher. Here is a very simple formula every great entrepreneur has learned the hard way.
1) Fail
2) Learn from your mistakes
3) Try again until you succeed.
There is nothing worse in life than never trying. Unfortunately most of us never do try and we’re stuck in jobs we hate trying to make ends meet, wondering how the guy on TV got so “lucky”. Never trying is the coward’s way out.
You are on this site so we know that you are not a coward. You may walk, talk and act like one but deep down you have something brewing and you are looking for a way to succeed. You’re just scared to take that chance. Well, what are you scared of? Not having just enough money to barely get by every month? Scared of what people might say? Scared of failing?
If you don’t do it now, you probably never will. And you know it. So just take a chance, for once.
*This article is for the guy or girl who absolutely hates their job and thinks they should be doing bigger and better things. This article is not for the person who has a good job and enjoys it.
But then again if you have a good job that you enjoy, why would you be reading this website?
The Time is Now (How to Get Ready for the Opportunity)
Historically fortunes have been made more so in times of great economic downturns than in times of great prosperity. We are in the midst of the worst depression in most of our lives. And there has never been a better time to make a lot of money and do some good in the world at the same time.
Most people will tell you that now is not the time to start a business. Now is not the time to take a risk. You need to hold on to that crummy J.O.B. (just over broke) because it pays and it’s hard to find a job right now. These people will tell you that you are crazy for taking a chance. Everyone is one of “those” people at some point. Scared to take a chance. But not you. Not anymore. In fact, it is precisely because of “those” people that now is the time to start your own thing. Why? Because no one else is. Everyone is scared to think outside the box. And that’s why you’re going to make your fortune and they are going to toil away in the “safe” jobs with all those great benefits (insurance that they pay for, loss of time and freedom, bending to the will of others, paying more taxes than the average millionaire etc..).
So what should you tell those people about why you’re starting a new business and what it’s all about? Nothing. Don’t tell anyone anything about your plans. There are two reasons for this.
1) Statistically you are less likely to follow through with your plans if you start blabbing about them. The reason is that you subconsciously feel like you have accomplished them simply by talking about them and are less active in actually fulfilling them. How many times has someone told you their great plan to make money and then never followed through with anything? My guess is a million.
2) People will tell you that you are crazy or dumb or both. They will come up with all kinds of reasons and excuses to try and talk you out of doing anything. Deep down no one wants their friends and co-workers to do better than them. That’s why you simply don’t say anything.
So now you know what not to tell people. Now you’re asking yourself what kind of business to start and not tell people about. Well, I could give you all kinds of ideas about businesses to start but they wouldn’t mean anything. Deep down in your heart of hearts you know what type of business you want to start. You may not be able to put your finger on it but you will, eventually. I spent years trying to figure out what I wanted to do. I knew what I didn’t want to do. I didn’t want to wake up every morning, put on clothes I didn’t want to wear, rush out the door to sit in traffic for an hour, get to a job I hated, let them tell me when I can take my break, sit in another hour of traffic to get home. All for – what is now in hindsight – a crummy, crummy paycheck.
Now I wake up when I want to, which is way earlier than I ever wanted to wake up when I hated my job. I work from my home office and I generally wear a pair of black shorts to work. I get most of my business done in the morning and do whatever else I want throughout the day. Which is mostly work related. You’ll find you work way harder when you love what you do.
Anyway, back to what type of business to start. What I used to do is visualize what I wanted to do. I didn’t know exactly what type of business it would be but I would visualize myself dressed very well and spending most of my working day driving around to various appointments. I’m a real estate investor so most of my work is spent driving around to peoples houses to see if I want to buy them (the houses, not the people). Before I knew what I wanted to do I had a vision in my head of how I would do it.
I used to live in a tiny little one bedroom apartment. Technically it was the worst place I ever lived. It was actually the best though. That was my laboratory. I would sit around and write out lists of what I could do and what I couldn’t do. Trying to figure out where I could start a business and how. I would write notes to myself that had my goals on them and tape them all over the walls. People who came over thought I was crazy. But those little notes worked. I suggest you do the same. The motivation from these notes is terrific. The best one I had was a note taped across my computer monitor that read “I will be in business for myself by such and such date”. And you know what? I was in business for myself by that date.
For those wanting to start their own business I would suggest leading a very Spartan lifestyle. I don’t mean by killing Persians, but I do mean getting rid of things you don’t need. There is no point in paying a $1500 mortgage if you can rent for $400. There’s no point in leasing a Jag for $700 a month if you can buy a running Toyota for $2,000. No point in going out to eat every night if you can survive on a can of soup and a cheese sandwich. Now is not the time to be wasteful with your money. You need every dime you can get your hands on and it’s ok to live like a bum. It will pay off in the end.
Ask yourself these questions:
Will this $100 cable bill with 500 channels help me reach my goals?
If the answer is no, cancel the cable!
Will going out tonight with my friends and spending $75 on food and drinks help me reach my goal?
If the answer is no, don’t do it!
As your business you need to either pick something you love or something you are en expert at. You need to devote all of your time and energy to that endeavor. Start reading books every single week. I don’t mean the new Michael Crichton or the new Stephen King, or that new romance book you saw at Wal-Mart. Those books don’t exist anymore. Start reading auto-biographies of successful people. Start reading books that have to do with your chosen field. Start reading business books and motivational books. Read all of those books you can get your hands on. Never stop reading those books.
Start exercising! A healthy body is a healthy mind. You will need to be in good shape to start your own business. There will be very, very stressful time ahead and it will help if you are in good physical shape. Lay off the cigarettes and booze too. Those do nothing to help you achieve your goals. They only help to kill you faster. Even if you don’t have a business idea yet, you ARE waiting for the opportunity. Opportunity comes to those who are prepared. In fact there is an opportunity out there waiting for you right now. What are you going to do when it presents itself? Will you take it?
….or will you let is pass you by?
8 Reasons Every Man Should Lift Weights
#1) Weight Training will make you feel strong and fit – There is a reason this is number 1, it is the most important aspect. A feeling of strength and power will give you confidence you possibly never had. We have all heard the saying a strong body is a strong mind and it is absolutely true. Strength IS confidence.
“I have never met a truly strong person who didn’t have self-respect.” Henry Rollins
#2) Weight Training will help to burn more fat – There is a prevailing myth that the only way to burn fat is to do cardio. Nonsense. Building solid muscle mass with an adequate diet is the absolute best way to get rid of those love handles. Muscle mass raises your metabolism. Muscle mass burns fat. Build more muscle to burn more fat. If you don’t have muscle mass to begin with cardio may help you lose weight but you will not get the toned look. At best you will look skinny-fat if all you do is cardio. That’s good enough for some, but it’s not good enough for you.
Vince Gironda never did cardio in his entire life.
#3) Weight Training will increase your energy – It’s an invigorating feeling getting under a bar and lifting what you never thought you could lift. That energy stays with you. There is no better high than after an intense workout, no chemical substance can match the feeling of calm after a great workout. Enough of the routines, driving to work, needing cup after cup of coffee, only to be exhausted by the time you get home, enough energy to eat pizza and watch tv all night long. Turn off the TV, put down the pizza, and pick up some weights. You will thank yourself later.
#4) Weight Training will teach you discipline and hard work – Our society is soft. Our Men are weaklings. You must remember, nothing good ever came from something easy. It takes hard work, pain, and sacrifice.
No stranger to hard work, here Arnold “Failure is not an option, everyone must succeed” Schwarzenegger shows what a little hard work and determination can accomplish.
#5) Weight Training will make you healthier – After several months of weight training you will notice you get less colds, flus, and other sicknesses. That is because regular exercise improves sleep patterns.
Better sleep + regular training = stronger immune system.
Your body has become stronger from the inside out. Weight Training will also help bone strength and density, cardiovascular disease, diabetes, cancer, depression and a host of other illnesses.
#6) Weight Training will improve poor posture – In the age of the computer, many of us sit for long periods hunched over. This is horrible for our posture. Most people have weak backs, weak abdominals and walk with a hunch. Strengthen your body, especially your back and your abs, and walk upright with a purpose, a drive. Don’t walk hunched over like you’re ready to die at any moment. Life is for the living. Hit the weights.
Does is look like Lou Ferrigno has a posture problem?
#7) Weight Training will help you look good naked – Perhaps this should be reason #1. To attract the opposite sex. A strong, virile man gets more women than out of shape oafs. A strong body signals the opposite sex that you are healthy and virile and that is mighty sexy. There is a reason that all the ads you see feature men with a 6 pack. Weight Training is the only way to achieve that look. It will “tone” the muscles to make them look nice.
Do you think the ladies are kicking Greg Plitt out of bed?
#8) Weight Training is FUN – After you get through the initial phase of forcing yourself to get to the gym you may realize you actually enjoy being there. There is nothing better than pushing through plateaus and lifting weights heavier than you have ever dreamed. Breaking past your previous limitations is a thrill. It gets to be damned fun.
Nick
RECENT COMMENTS